Intimate O(pi)nions

I have previously told you to put your photo up on your dating profile, no matter what you look like. What you look like is only one aspect of it, so let’s think about the kind of photo you should try to get or find.

1. Pick a current photo

Don’t use a photo that was taken 10 years or 20 kilos ago, even if you looked better then. Take a new photo!

2. Select one that shows the real you

If you never put on make up or wear a biker jacket, don’t take a photo in which you do. Good option is to take a photo before you’re going out and still getting ready by yourself or with your friends, that’s when you’re presentable and hopefully on a good mood! Go through the photos of you on Facebook and see if a friend has managed to capture the best of you on camera. A word of warning though. Don’t use a photo that shows you obviously drunk. It’s not a good look.

3. Do not bother taking a super model -quality photo

You can take a photo with a professional photographer, as long as they understand this is not a glamour shot. If a photo is too good, like ripped straight out of a magazine -good, people will think it’s a fake photo and not contact you thinking that you want to sell them a membership to an adult website. If you are really good with Photoshop, don’t fix the photo with every trick you’ve got up in your sleeve, just adjust the colour balance, lighting and the basic stuff, maybe remove a blazing red pimple of your face and remove red eyes, but that’s it!

4. Don’t include your friends

This is one time when you don’t want your friends around you! Especially you don’t want an ex in your photo, that goes without saying. I wouldn’t even do a blank-out-the-friends -edit, it’s kind of tacky, but then again, if you really cannot handle a camera without your friends, maybe you have to. I’m sure there will be members of the opposite sex who symphatise, but remember to mention the fact you don’t like being photographed on your profile!

5. Ask your friends

What you do need your friends for is to a) take the photo and b) pick the photo for you, if you are unsure. For best results, if you want to find a girl, ask your female friends, and if you want to find a guy, ask your male friends. Often we do have an odd idea what the opposite sex wants of us, so it’s safer to go by their opinion. They can also help you to find the photo that looks the most natural and “like you”. Obviously you won’t have much of a clue about it. Related to this, I had one photo of me that I really didn’t like at all, but everyone kept saying what a lovely photo it was. I never used it on my dating profile because I didn’t like it, but it probably would have been a good idea on a hind sight.

If you do take a photo yourself, use the camera timer, and rather not take the photo from your arms length or especially not through the mirror. Most cameras have a self timer function that is fairly easy to use. Consult your manual if necessary.

Example

I have included a photo of myself on this post. If I was creating a profile now, and that photo was recent, I would probably go with that one. One reason is that it is rare that I’m smiling like that on photos, but I smile like that in the real life all the time. Nothing is more attractive than a big smile. As you can see, my hair is not done, I’m wearing glasses (I could pick a photo with contacts on, too) and an old worn out biker jacket that I love, and the background is very much not prepared for a photo, but it shows my personality more than any other photo I have, I think. What do you think? A good call or a bad call?

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