Intimate O(pi)nions

Archive for June 12th, 2009

When you start approaching people online, you have to be aware that not all social networks are dating sites. This means, that even though the site might look like a dating site, it might have similar functions, it still may not be one. Now that social networking has become more of a norm, I suppose misplaced dating requests have gotten fewer (active daters, can you confirm?), but I doubt that it had stopped completely.

Pen pal sites, Social Networking sites, Business networking sites etc: They are not dating sites, and you should not assume that all women there want to be married to a man from Ghana. Do not disturb people who are not looking for love there, even if they were single. I know it is sometimes hard to understand why people would use a social site and still be annoyed for someone contacting them, but you just have to agree to disagree.

If you are on a strictly dating site, the type that has happy couples in the front, uses phrases like “dating site” (dead giveaway) “romance”, “love” and the sort, you are safe to assume that people there are looking for love. Regardless, they are not looking for just any kind of love:

Read their profile

To find out what the person is there for, read the profile! It’s that simple, always read the profile before contacting anyone. That is just common courtesy and wise. It gives you an competitive edge too, because a lot of people don’t read profiles. Pick something that you find interesting about it, and when you write the first message, mention that interesting thing, so the receiver knows you went through the trouble and you’re not just speeding through a bunch of pretty/handsome people.

“But that takes time and she/he still won’t reply, I know!”

If that’s what you’re saying, you’ve already lost. The best you can expect to get from this, is someone who is VERY DESPERATE to meet someone. People want to feel special, especially when it comes to the matters of love. If you send random messages to random people, you will give them the impression that you don’t care at all who’s going to reply to you as long as someone does, and that makes you seem desperate and thus undesirable.

You wouldn’t (hopefully) try to pick up every member of the opposite sex at a Entrepeneur’s Conference, so make sure you know why everyone has come to this place. Sure enough, there will be someone wishing for a fling at the conference as well, just as there will be at a normal social networking site, but you’ll have to know who the people are and how to approach them. Online it’s just that much easier: RTFP (Read the Fucking Profile.)

Popularity: 4% [?]